I was walking to Starbucks one day after work when a gentleman approached me. He offered to buy me a drink. At first I thought he was trying to sell me something. I was about to ignore him when he told me that he thought that I was 'kind of attractive'.
Although I was flattered by the gesture and I didn't particularly hate the idea of someone else buying a soy latte for me, I decided to say no and instead asked him what made him think that I was gay. And he replied, "It was your bag".
As I lit my cigarette and take my first sip of the soy latte that I bought for myself, I began to wonder, is it okay to label people's sexuality based on the bags that they carry? I seriously have no idea that my black Zara carry-all screams gay. First of all, it's not pink! I bought it from Zara Men, not Zara Women or Zara Queer for that matter!
Well, I guess the guy has either been living under a rock or a Mormon village in god-knows-where because this is Kuala Lumpur in 2009. The sight of men carrying expensive bags is no longer unusual or something that makes head rolls. Men have more stuff to carry compared to those days when everything can simply be shoved into our five-pocket pants. Those pre-war days are behind us as five pockets are no longer enough to accommodate our two or three cell phones, iPod, keys, sunglasses, cigarette box, card holder, handkerchief, lip balm, sunscreen and even wallet.
With the rising popularity of everything skinny, the back pocket of the pants is no longer the place for your wallet; unless you want one side of your behind appears fuller than the other. So men's bag is now without a doubt, is a man's best friend. There are so many options, yet to choose the right bag is a tricky business.
I always have different bags for different occasions; leather briefcase for work, carry-all for weekend, weekender for sleepover, canvas tote that I usually rocked with skinny jeans and the list goes on. Most designers modeled their men's bag collection after the looks from their womenswear line. That is the reason why some bags have the tendency to uncannily resemble women's handbag which becomes the indicator for one's sexuality. I always try to avoid heavy embellishments, flowers (think Gucci Resorts 2009 collection), experimental shapes, patent leather and loud colors.
The best is to go for muted earth tones (navy is acceptable) and material like canvas and tough leather (one is good for weekend and the other for weekdays). It is also important to make sure that the bag really serves its purpose; that is to carry our daily loads. I once bought an oversized hold-all in heavy leather. It looked awesome but I felt like dragging around a sackful of oxygen tanks each time I used it on the weekends. My hand hurts and I did what's best for both of us- the bag and I. I shoved it deep into the corner of my closet and use it as storage.
I love my bags. They are a part of my daily outfits and I can't imagine walking around in the city without one. Men's bag is functional and it is certainly not in any ways a declaration of one's sexuality. As for the guy who offered to buy me coffee, I think it's about time he moved on from his high-school backpack.
Originally published in 2009 on www.emmagem.com
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